To keep your disagreements from damaging your relationship, set up some respectful ground rules during a calm moment. These might include no name-calling or criticizing, making sure each person gets to have a say, really listening to each other and taking a break from the discussion if it gets too heated, as long as you promise to revisit the issues within a day or two.
If you and your partner keep having the same arguments with no progress in sight, seek help from a therapist or marriage counselor.
You have to change your single ways when you are with someone. My best friend, who has been madly in love with her husband for more than a decade, told me that love is not about finding the one—love is choosing to be with someone despite your differences and working together because you are a good team.
She told me love is not about give and take—it may seem like you are giving more, but in the end, things always balance themselves out. She told me not to keep count of who does more. I also learned it makes more sense to take love and relationship advice from friends based on their relationship status because there is always an overflow of self-appointed advisors who think they know.
Choose someone who is willing to risk themselves in the process because you would do the same. Choose someone who chooses you with the same promise you made yourself—a promise of happiness that comes with a price, but a price well worth it. Choose reliability over momentary excitement; choose stability over temporary fun. Life is short and life is unpredictable. Now more than ever, I know that things can change anytime.
I will never let my ego ruin my happiness. Men on the other hand orgasm quicker and afterwards feel sleepy. This resting period offered the chance for another man to have sex with the woman, once again encouraging sperm competition. But surely, things have changed over time. Modern relationships are built on love and respect, and sex with that one special person will always be great! Ultimately we are still biologically programmed to seek sex with multiple partners, even though we put in serious effort into being monogamous.
This conflict between our biological selves and our cultural upbringing can be a profound source of unhappiness and inner tension in our lives. In the end, monogamy is something that we must learn how to master. EDIT: We have been called out for the misleading title, so we modified it to better emphasize that this is a theory and not scientific mainstream. But is it? So much beauty and so much monstrosity? The answer is simple.
Love is perfect — the one thing in the entire universe that is entirely perfect. And being such means it must hold everything within it — both good and evil, both beauty and ugliness, both peace and war. Love is the single power in this universe that is perfection. It is mutable, multifaceted. It can grow in strength and dissipate. Love is whatever we wish it to be. Or rather, love is whatever we make it to be. Whether what we make of it is what we wish it to be, is an entirely different question.
Understanding love and what it allows for is arguably the most important lesson a person can learn in his or her lifetime. It is the one thing that every single human being in the world — and plenty of animals as well — longs for. Love is what drives us to act.
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